Did you pick the perfect man to get into a relationship with?”
This is the most crucial step to any new relationship. If you pick the perfect man to love, relationships are a breeze. By perfect man, we mean perfect for you. A guy who’s got your back, who knows you well, who says all the right things. He’s an overall great guy.
So why doesn’t anyone ever think about it? It’s just not romantic, huh? There is no contemplation or decision making in “happily ever after.”
So then why do so few people ever get to happily ever after? The answer is clear and brutally honest: you picked the wrong guy to fall in love with! That is so hard to hear for so many people, but if you believe there is someone out there just for you, picking the first guy to come along has nothing to do with fate, destiny, or true love. You have to go out and find the right man and not settle for “just OK.”
Another pitfall in finding the perfect man is thinking “He’s got all this stuff going for him, but there’s this one thing I’ll have to fix later…” The things about him that aren’t so cool now will really have you climbing the wall later. Never bank on the idea that he’ll ever change for you. Guys are pretty much what you see is what you get.
How can I tell if he’s right?
The answer is simple: ask a lot of questions! We’re not just talking the standard, “What’s your job” and “Where do you live” questions. You need to go deeper. Michael Webb has been labeled “The world’s most romantic man” and he’s written a book that’s perfect for this very situation.1000 Questions for Couples teaches you to get inside his mind and how to ask those questions you really want to know in a way that’s fun and easy. Find out everything you need to know before you let this man into your heart.
When you ask a lot of questions and you ask the right questions, you not only get a glimpse of what life will be like with this new perfect man, you also engage him on a very deep level. He will think you’re pretty cool because people love to talk about themselves. If you have great questions to ask, then he automatically thinks you’re smart, social, and very interesting. Besides, it’s always a great idea to get a guy talking and keep him talking; it adds to your mystery.
Ask yourself these questions
Don’t stop with just asking him all the questions. We need to check in on how you feel. Any man you are considering should be help up to the following questions to see if he really could be the one.
- Can I spend the rest of my life with this guy? What is his current lifestyle like? Could he be part of your circle of friends? Can you take him along for family activities? Does he compliment your lifestyle and career choice or would he be embarrassing to bring along? Will your friends and family see him as the perfect man?
- Does he make my life easier? Think hard about this one. The whole purpose of being in a relationship is having someone to share the human experience with. Two people getting together to conquer the world as a team. Is he really part of your team or are you more like his assistant, his bank, or his mother?
- Does he have a future? Whether in relationships or in business, poor partners make poor partners. IÂ’m not saying you can only set your sights on rich dudes, but you should be looking for someone who at least has potential. If heÂ’ll probably still be living with his parents in five years or has no desire to work hard for anything, he will probably treat your relationship with the same enthusiasm.
- Are there any “issues” keeping him from giving 100% to me? Was he hurt by an ex-girlfriend or ex-wife and now he hates women? Does he have “baby mama drama?” Did he have a terrible childhood and now he can’t open up emotionally to anyone? Bless you for giving him a chance, but you have a truckload of work ahead of you in this relationship. Great relationships are effortless. The more the right man is ready and willing to give his love to you, the happier your life will be.
- Does he interest me intellectually? Are you guys both on the same page? It sucks dating someone you look down on. Pick someone you can talk to endlessly about things youÂ’re interested in too.
- Does he understand my emotional needs? If you have no problems showing your emotions and pick a guy with the emotional maturity of a bag of sand, you’re in for some problems. Some guys have no attachment to their emotions and showing any emotions might make them “fruity.” If you’re into ultra-manly men, this might not be an issue, but if you need to know he’s thinking about you, it might be a better idea to choose a man who can say it.
- Am I attracted to him sexually? Why is this one so overlooked?
Eventually, all those happy, lovey feelings fade and if you are stuck in a relationship that doesnÂ’t have a strong foundation, you are in for the pain of a break up or a lifetime of silent misery.
The trick is to only allow the great guys a chance at your heart and pick the perfect man from the very beginning.
Keeping the perfect man
You found him, now what?
Now we get to the hard part (and most fun): How do I keep the perfect man happy and with me? The short answer is… Be Awesome!
It’s also a very vague and very silly answer to this question. Sure, you’re pretty awesome right now, but do you have everything it takes to be the only thing on Mr. Perfect’s perfect mind? We all can use a little help in this department. The number one thing you absolutely have to do is to have unstoppable confidence that you have the skills to keep this guy around. This system is awesome because it kills all of those nagging little questions: “Does he think I’m fat? Does he think I’m dumb? Does he love me? Where are we going with this?” Blah, blah, blah…
You gotta rock who you are! If you don’t think you’re worthy of the perfect man, then obviously you aren’t!
Be sure you check out our section on how to be irresistibly attractive. After confidence, you have to take care of everything else. Find out some great tips on handling every aspect of your life. The more well rounded you are, the more captivating you become! There’s a great marketplace of products and information to get you well on you’re way to becomming the perfect woman!
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