Question submitted by Adria Young, Fulda, Germany
I can never seem to figure out how to be happy in my relationships. I’ve found a few guys that were absolutely perfect, but I always felt like I wasnt getting what I needed. No matter what they did or what I did, eventually, my relationships just end.
I know this is a huge question, but how can I just be in the relationship and how can I find true happiness with a guy I can simply love?
Im not a bad person, and Im definitely loving as much as I can be, but things always go wrong and its mostly my fault. I hate being alone, but I cant stand the thought of feeling trapped again and having to run away from another good man.
Where does happiness come from?
On your quest on how to find happiness, you have been looking for it to magically show up with the next great guy who happens into your life. Happiness is something that only you have control over. Sure, cute guys do a damn good job making you feel great about yourself, but only up to a point.
You seem to be hitting this point over and over again at the same point you lose that magic feeling of a great new relationship. Basically, once the honeymoon is over its all over! Thats a pretty hard way to go through life.
What might be the sticking point here is that you show up to a relationship with everything you already need: your happy little self! The moment you find yourself relying on someone else to fulfill your emotional needs, is the moment you start to suffer.
Whats the definition of suffering?
There is a dictionary term, but in the relationship world, suffering is when you expect your lover to complete you. In a perfect world, he has all those qualities you wish you had, a cute butt, a great job with a huge house, dimples, and an encyclopedic knowledge of great wines and fascinating subjects. Hes an avid skydiver and part-time cowboy
In the real world, he has his own set of problems and shortcomings. He might even be waiting for you to make him be happy. People you love have their own free will to do whatever they wish and many of those things are not what you want them to be.
When it comes to how to be happy in your relationships, acceptance and compromise are at the top of the list. You simply have to let your love be exactly who they are going to be. If the person they really are is not that interesting, or mean, ignorant, and disrespectful, Its time to pack up and leave, sister!
To put it plainly, people never change! You can’t spend one minute waiting for him to become more attentive, smarter, driven or even better looking. If your mans negatives outweigh the positives, theres not much more you can do but leave or suffer.
But he’s great, now can I be happy?
So if he’s a great guy and hes doing all the great things that make up an ideal boyfriend, why are you still not happy? Once again, he cant bring you real happiness no matter what he does. Happiness is the one thing you have complete control over.
First off, we need to remove those thoughts that are telling you whatever youre doing now isnt making you happy. Think of it this way: if there is something you do over and over or feel compelled to do that isnt making you happy, why is that? You might say that its learned behavior and your stupid brain is stuck in a pattern. That could very well be true. OR this thing you do might actually make you happy in spite of what society, your teachers, your mom, your friends, your priest, or the kid who sells you newspapers has told you to believe.
Wait a second, you mean the things I do that I think are making me miserable are actually making me happy?!! That, also, could very well be true. A great place to start is with Panic Away. If you read through this website, you’ll find how highly we recommend this system. What it does is train your mind to think in ways that actually help you instead of making you feel worse about yourself. What better way to learn how to be happy than to unlearn all those thoughts that are keeping you from feeling good?
Right now, you can take control of your life today with an amazing system to calm your nerves and get your mind back on track to only being there to make you feel incredible! If youve been plagued by feeling unhappy in your relationships or with your life in general, now is the time to do something about it! If you really want to be happy, this system works wonders.
Do something to be happy
Waiting around for something to happen to give you that happy feeling might work sometimes, but come on, do you really want to spend the rest of your life anxiously waiting for something to happen?
You have to actually follow your dreams to be happy! Scientists have actually found that happy chemicals are released in your brain whenever you accomplish your goals. Open a new browser window and start researching that one thing you’ve always wanted to do. What’s stopping you? Is it money? If you want something bad enough, you will find a way to finance it. Student loans are always available. But you can get a grant if you know the secret place to look! If what you want to do can somehow help humanity, theres bound to be someone out there who wants to help pay for it.
Be happy about yourself
Its hard to feel happy about your life when you dont feel good about yourself. Then DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! There are a million ways out there for you to feel good about yourself. Lets start with the outside and work our way in. You dont have to look very hard to find all the products and services you need to look better. In fact, you can cure your acne, fix your excessive hair loss , get some new makeup techniques, and find your fashion voice that will help you create the perfect outfit for seduction!
The reality is that if there is something you dont like about yourself, someone, somewhere has figured out a way to fix it. What if its your body thats bringing you down? Then its a matter of changing your perspective. Have you ever considered hypnosis? Now before you start thinking that soon youll be uncontrollably hopping around like a bunny, it’s really not like that at all. Hypnosis is essentially just having a chat with your subconscious. The subconscious mind is all about keeping you alive. If you do something and don’t die, then it thinks it’s doing its job. The problem is that what you may be doing isn’t killing you, but it isn’t making you any happier either. What hypnosis does is give suggestions to a deeper part of your brain to consider thinking differently about it.
For example, you might find that when you feel bored, you eat something. Not a very productive thought process. Hypnosis suggests to your inner brain to stop doing that and do something else instead. Or if you absolutely hate working out, hypnosis can help you change your mind so you can actually see how rewarding it is. Have we convinced you how safe and effective it is yet? Then check out The Power of Self-Hypnosis They have tons of programs to work on every place you brain has you trapped.
Confidence is the best step towards happiness
If you are really set on learning how to be happy, then learning confidence is one step you can’t forget. Confidence echoes into every aspect of your life. The better you feel about yourself, the more people at work notice how great you are, the more likely you are to get a raise. When you get a raise, you live a better life and meet more dynamic people. The cooler your friends are, the better the people you date are etc etc etc.
Bottom line is that if you dont feel confident in most situations, you dont feel happy. You should check out the Unstoppable Confidence system. This is about as in-depth as you can get to finding your awesome and leading the sweet life you wish you had. Dont be sad and anxious any more. Make your world rock!
But what about my relationships?
If you havent already figured it out yet, having a man in your life is not going to magically make you happy! True happiness comes from inside. An awesome relationship will do tons to help you feel good about yourself, but you cant find the perfect guy without having a little perfect going on in yourself first.
That is why this is the first step to being irresistible. No one in the world is sitting alone thinking, I really wish I had a grumpy girlfriend to make me feel whole. People find happiness captivating! Work on you and how to be happy and that one great relationship will fall right into your lap. We promise!