So I found a place where I can tell my story. I’m 33 years old, married with kids. My husband and I have been together for 12 years.
From the very beginning there were problems in the sex department: he wanted a lot more sex than I did. And every time I turned him down, he would get very upset. As the years went by I completely lost all my passion for sex with him, it became some kind of work I had to do to make sure things will be OK at home for a few days.
But a few years ago he developed an erectile dysfunction. It got very bad because we kept having the same amount of sex as before, only without the erection. After a while I confronted my husband about it (very gently, of course) and he said he was not aware of the problem, but if there is one, it is strictly my fault, because I turned him down etc…
So he will not get help for it, i’m the one who needs help. I felt so said and unwanted. But on the other hand I missed having normal sex very much! Not just with an erection, but also sex that comes from passion, not as a price for a peaceful home…
So I found a guy who would do it for money, went to his apartment and there it all happened. For the first time in so long I felt attractive, wanted, welcome! I paid him 100 dollars, but even that didn’t spoil it for me. He said I could call him anytime and we could get together for free. So I did. We’ve been seeing each other every month since then. It makes me feel great and helps a lot with all my misery at home. There is no question at the end of this confession. I know what I’m doing is wrong and I’m doomed to loose everything.
Still, it’s worth it. Thanks for listening, you’re welcome to comment 🙂