Meant to be
by Janice, 35
(Canada)
My boyfriend and I were meant to be. He and I met when we were 15 and 16 through mutual friends. I thought he was funny, a bit of a smart@ss, but a good guy.
All through High School we got along great. I thought the world of him, just never thought of him romantically. He and one other guy we knew were the two guys I thought the world of… the other incidentally later married my best friend!
After High School he got mixed up with an older woman, had kids, was married and had several relationships and jobs that didn’t work out. I moved away, spent the next few years spinning my wheels, not really doing or amounting to anything, just partying because I had no direction. I got mixed up in a few relationships that were definitely destructive to me. I kept changing jobs because I still did not know what I wanted.
Little did I know that he was basically doing the same thing in another part of the country. Three years ago I saw an old picture of him in a group on facebook. I wondered where he was, how he was. I typed in his name….nothing came up. Months later I was getting ready for bed one night. I decided to go on facebook before bed. I had a friend request….guess who it was???
I instantly let out an ‘OMG!’ He was online and we talked for a few minutes. Over the next couple of weeks we talked more. It didn’t take long to realize that he, even though he never said anything, had been thru a lot. I was scared to ask. I decided to drive down to where he was living to see him.
I must admit I was a little concerned as to who I would find after 13 years but I went because something in me told me if I do anything in this life I need to do this! We were really happy to see each other. It was awkward at first for sure, but it got easier. We were watching TV and talking when we both noticed at the same time that we were both singing the same old country songs on a time life commercial.
Thats where it all started… we soon discovered that we liked almost all the same things. We would spend six hours a night on the computer or the phone. Every couple of weeks one of us would travel to see the other. Finally after 4.5 months of that, he moved in with me. My parents were not impressed even though I was 33 at the time.
That’s when things started to get hard. My mother wouldn’t talk to me for a year. I became very depressed and gained alot of weight. For Christmas that year, he saved his money and got me the instrument that I have wanted since I was a kid. He was there every day when I cried. He was patient, understanding, and comforting. I helped him sort out some things in his life that were messed up and he gave me the encouragement and love to overcome some of the emotional trauma’s that I had put myself thru.
Together we make a pretty good team. 2.5 years later, we are still together, still love each other as much as we once did and we are the best of friends. We don’t do anything without the other person. I have never been the type to spend every waking minute with someone but he is so easy to have around. We rarely argue or fight and when we do its over as soon as it starts…
We have the same kind of kindness about us and we think the same way about alot of things. What one doesn’t have the other does. I’m not patient and I get overly emotional, he stays calm. He doesn’t do well under pressure and with critical thinking but I do. We couldn’t be any more well suited for each other. Had I only seen 20 years ago what I see now, we wouldn’t have missed out on the years in between. That doesn’t matter because all the years and all the miles between us and we found each other again.
I have never met a guy that I couldn’t imagine living without except for him… We were simply meant to be!