“How do I turn a booty call into a boyfriend?”

Do you seem to always end up as the booty call? A reader poses the age-old question: How do you go from booty call to girlfriend?

“I want to turn this booty call into a boyfriend. Am I too late? I was dating this guy for like a month. Everything was good and he looked really interested in me. Eventually, he asked me to be his girl and we had sex for the first time that same night. Things were really good until he got this new job and he started calling me less and less and was only texting.

One night he obviously noticed I was kinda mad at the fact that he barely called so he text me and said, “I know I haven’’t been the best boyfriend but I’’m trying to get my shit together.” I told him to do what’’s best for him first.

The next day he only texted me twice; good morning and at the night he said, “Hey ma!…” and I responded and went to sleep after he never texted back. The next day around 1 pm I texted him saying I could no’t handle not communicating and it was probably not the best time for us to be in a relationship. If he was going to be my boyfriend then I want him to call me at least once a day. He did no’t reply to my text until the next day and said that I was right and that he did n’ot want to hurt me. I did n’ot reply.

We didn’’t talk for 2 days and then I saw him at the club and I told him we had to talk. We had a conversation and he said that he going through a lot that he didn’t mean to hurt me. He also said that he kinda does n’ot feel like being alive at times because he is not happy.

Lately, he’’s been texting me once in a while maybe twice a week. He asked me to see him and I said OK so he picked me up and we ended up having sex. He acted like we were still together and even though we had sex I was acting kinda aloof towards him. The next day he texted me asking how my day was and I answered. I texted him 3 times after that and the last text he didn’’t respond. And he did n’ot text me or call me the next day either.

I really like him and want to work things out. I want to know if having sex with him could bring us back? I know I’’m a bootycall right now but is there any hope? How can I turn this booty call into a boyfriend?”

What went wrong?

What happened here is that he faded out of the relationship and you allowed it to happen. Sure there are all kinds of reasons a guy will slowly back out of a relationship. You said he started a new job that seemed to take up a bunch of his time. He is also depressed, but you were so forgiving and allowing, he just made you into a booty call. The other (less visible) issue is that you picked a guy that was emotionally unavailable and then later on, completely unavailable. If this happens to you a lot, we recommend the book The Art of Irresistible. It goes through all the things men are magically drawn to and how to take yourself from booty call to girlfriend material. More importantly, it helps you to actually choose the right guy from the very beginning.

Some guys just don’t like a lot of emotional attachment (although he does no’t mind the sex). Obviously, this is not what you are looking for. Not that there is anything wrong with having a man on the sidelines to come in and give you a little physical attention, but it is obvious you want to go from a booty call to a girlfriend.

So why did he fade away? If you’re the kind of person who blames everyone else for your problems, then the answer is simple: he’s just not that into you. But for others who don’t like being a victim, the answer lies solely upon your shoulders.

Turn a booty call into a boyfriend

The very first step is to not allow bad behaviour. Things started to go down hill when you texted to say you should not be in a relationship, but you texted instead of calling him up or confronting him in person.

Texting is the easy way out of conflict not only for you, but especially for him. Can you really show him how serious you were using a bunch of letters that are no’t even words? Stop taking the cowardly way out and go talk to him in person. You had some chemistry in the beginning, but when he does no’t have to hear your voice or see your beauty or feel your body, you are just a bunch faceless words on his phone screen.

The trick is to never let the line go slack. He’s been steadily pulling away since he got his job and you (who probably don’t like conflict) have been fading out of his life too. If you want him to call, stop waiting for him to call and call him! This is something you want, go get it. If you would rather text, then send something cute like, “I was just thinking about your lips.” Do and say things that make you girlfriend material!

The difference between a booty call and a boyfriend is that the booty call is just sex. In fact, texting has become the standard way booty calls communicate. So if you want to make your booty call into a boyfriend, you have to communicate on a much deeper level.

What can you do to get him?

First of all, you need to stop being such a pushover and show him how cool you really are. You can’t go from booty call into a boyfriend without being girlfriend material. I’m sure he’s seen it a little bit, but you need to show him that his life would suck without you.

Something you can do right away is stop being sad or whiny around him. It sounds like every time you contact each other, you are upset because you are sitting around waiting for something to happen. It’s a reminder of why he will only keep you as a booty call. Get Happy! Get sexy and get mysterious. Stop letting everyone know everything about you. Why has n’ot he turned you into a girlfriend? Because he’s getting everything he needs from you, but he’s not getting everything he wants. Why should he go from bootycall into a boyfriend if you aren’t giving him what he wants?

And what does he want? He wants a girl he can be proud to have on his arm. Not only do you have to be cute, but you also have to be fashionable, witty, and engaging. This is actually the whole point of The Art of Irresistible: When you take a whole bunch of little steps to becoming amazing, ending up as a booty call will never happen to you again.

Don’t be a stalker

The non-committal kind of guy needs room. He needs a lot of room. This is why he prefers texting because it’s much less personal. When I said about to start calling him more often, remember to pay attention to his reactions. If he’s sounding like he doesn’t want to talk or is nervous, get off the phone!

Pay attention to how he reacts to what you say and how he acts in certain situations. If you sense he’s getting antsy, then cut the meeting or conversation short and tell him you have things to do. Guys who are afraid of commitment, love women who don’t make them feel cornered. Time with you should be fun, and sexy, and interesting. When you show him how awesome you are, he will want to go from bootycall into a boyfriend (as long as he feels comfortable and does no’t feel trapped in any way).

You can make him a boyfriend

Yes, you can. It’s not too late! You just need the opportunity to show him how cool you are. The time you spend together should be meaningful and effortless. Stop being such a pushover and stand by what you need. Even if that does no’t get you exactly what you want, he will respect you enough to explain himself. Guys crave women they can consider equals, so start acting like his equal and tell him what you need.

If you really want a super-duper-secret weapon, you need to check out The Kegelmaster! Suddenly, sex with you is like nothing he’s ever felt before! If you really want to make yourself valuable to a man, give him a sexual experience that will leave him shivering in ecstasy!

You can turn him from bootycall into a boyfriend if you have the right mindset, you’’re valuable, you’’re effortless, and you’ have got something about you that he craves. Go get him girl!

Back to top of Bootycall Into a Boyfriend
Back to Dating Secrets