Does an open relationship really work?
Contrary to what many people will tell you, open relationships really do work,but you have to set this up from the very beginning. Are you considering open sexual relationships? Now that’s a different story.
Let’s look at the way you have approached dating before: you meet a cute guy, start seeing him and eventually you find out hes not right for you for whatever reason. This process could take a couple months. It could takeyears! Its not a very efficient way to find the perfect love.
We have mentioned before that there are 6 billion people on this planet. Being the super picky girl that you are, that still leaves you with over 30,000 guys who are perfect for you. At the pace you’re going right now, you might check out only about 25 to 50 men in your whole lifetime to see if they fit. You might pick a handful to invest in because they are promising enough. Not very efficient at all!
Something needs to change. The only way to find one of your 30,000 is to start screening them all. Get out there and go on some dates! Please understand this does not mean you need to sleep with every one of them. You don’t even need to spend more than a half-hour with someone to know they are not right for you.
How do you even get multiple guys in your life? Girl, you need to learn How to be Irresistible to Men. Sometimes you need some real psychological principles on what it takes to really captivate a man. If you put all of the awesome advice from this book into practice, you’ll be swimming in cute men!
If youre single or just starting over, now is your time to do things right from the very beginning. Stop being so unapproachable and say ”Yes!” to every decent opportunity.
Honesty is important in any open relationship
If you let a guy know from the very beginning that you are dating around and he chooses to stay, then he has essentially agreed to it. This is where everyone gets caught up. They are scared or embarrassed to tell the truth because they think it will make the guy flee in a jealous rage. It could not be further from the truth! Any time you tell someone what you expect from the very beginning and they come back, they are giving you the stamp of approval.
Plus, they are not that invested in you yet, so they don’t really care if you are seeing every guy you can. But you must be honest and let him know you have other upcoming dates.
Exaggerate if you have to
No one likes to eat in an empty restaurant. Empty restaurants are a sign of bad food, bad service, bad reviews or all of the above. This also applies to your dating life. When you admit to him that you havent gone out on a date in seven years, first he’ll wonder whats wrong with you. He’ll speculate you must be crazy or just released from women’s prison. Then, he’ll think you must be desperate for sex and try to rush you to bed. He might even decide he likes you, but you have that whole seven years of datelessness that means you’re hiding the crazy really well.
In every first date situation, try to work it into the conversation that you have gone out on a few dates recently. This shows that you are desirable to other men, you have a social life and that at least for now, this will be an open relationship.
Dating around says something about you
And its not what you think it is (sort of). As a teenager, dating around could get you labelled. Young dudes are easily confused and can’t handle you having so much power over them.
As an adult, it drives men crazy. They think they’re done with the confused little kid stage and this loss of power makes them have to step up. It subtly speaks that you are mature and emotionally stable enough to pull it off. It also means you are desirable enough to get away with it.
Besides, there aren’t many women that ever admit to this. You just made yourself stand out in the crowd.
It causes competition
Remember that time you broke up with your boyfriend only to be devastated to find out hes already dating again? You threw him out because he sucked, but now you’re heartbroken that he moved on. When you let on that you are all about keeping multiple boyfriends in open relationships, he feels the same kind of irrational desire to be the only one in your life.
You guys just met and hes already devising how to be your main squeeze!
Essentially, you have a full restaurant and he wants in the VIP section. Sometimes we can’t help wanting what everyone else wants too. He now realizes that to be the only horse in your stable, he has to step up an win you away from the other guys in your life. He’s a lot less likely to take for granted that he has you wrapped around his finger.
He will work harder to romance you when he knows he is being compared to other guys.
It flushes out the jealous guys
Dating jealous guys can suck the life out of you. They are insecure, petty, and sometimes mean. Even with a ton of other great features, its usually the jealousy that creeps into the relationship and eventually kills it.
You do not want to date jealous guys.
By telling him that there are other fish in the sea and you like to go swimming, you can see how he reacts. If he’s not happy, dont put a lot of effort into this guy. He might have a big problem with jealousy and childishness. If a guy can’t wrap his head around the fact that this is an open relationship and you will be going out on other dates, he definitely won’t be able to handle your independence in other areas.
Screen all eligible applicants
Once again in an open relationship, whether you sleep with any of these dudes is up to you, but things are much less complicated if you don’t. If you are serious about finding the perfect guy, then you should give everyone who meets the minimum requirements a chance. And c’mon, were only dealing with the first few dates. You’re only giving up about a half an hour for coffee and talking.
After a few dates, you might discover that you have found a worthy guy, and consider him a bit more seriously. We still recommend you keep it an open relationship and not head straight into monogamy like you have every other time in your past.
That only happens after both of you have the talk. You know, the one in which you officially decide to take things a bit more seriously. Some couples never have this talk and the committed relationship thing is implied. Don’t miss out on this very crucial step! It puts a guy in a commitment mindset! Either way, it’s still crucial to be completely honest about your dating so you don’t scare away a great boyfriend.
Starting any relationship as an open relationship might seem like a weird thing to do, but it works better than you can imagine. Any time you can keep a guy guessing and make yourself seem mysterious and just beyond his reach, you will drive him wild. If you want a guy to always have you on his mind, never let him know that he’s conquered you.
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