Are there any tricks on how to meet men online?
There are tons of great tricks on how to meet men online! Whats the single biggest way to meet a quality guy? Be different! Lets face it, everyone and their mom is online looking for love and they all pretty much say the same things: I wear jeans and a t-shirt, but also wear dresses, etc. etc… When it really comes down to it, a great picture will get you attention, but if you dont back it up with something really interesting to say, youll end up with a whole bunch of cavemen.
So whats the trick to meeting men online? Say something interesting and they all pour in like kittens to a can of tuna? Essentially, yes! Lets look at your intended target. Are you looking for something fun and casual? Don’t talk about serious things. Are you looking for the next great love? Don’t have your profile dripping with sexuality. Looking for a hook-up? Don’t get too deep in your profile.
If you are absolutely new at online dating and want to get good fast, the best book to read is The Right Man Online. Not only does it give you the basic run down on profiles, pictures, and safety, it also give you the exact language on how to speak to a man’s heart. How to reach that part of him that has been looking for you all along.
It’s important to write something that indicates your direction, but doesnt say it outright. For example, lets say youre really set on having children. NEVER say you want to have kids within a set amount of time. It makes you desperate and scary to everyone except the guys who are most desperate to make you also into their mom. Ouch… Instead say thay you are looking for a man who loves his family. It doesnt say exactly what you want it to, but it speaks volumes about your direction.
Learning how to meet men online is not about getting everything you’ve ever wanted in one man the very first date. You will have to put a bit more effort into it.
Also (and this is very important): don’t be a cheapskate! That’s right. This is going to cost you some money. That is the way all of these sites work. Don’t choose a site by it’s price. Browse a little bit before you decide and pick out a few guys that look promising. Then you can decide to join the site or not.
The online dating perfect picture
Make no mistake; men are visual creatures. Give them something enticing to look at. In fact, its better to have one flattering picture that doesn’t show how vibrant you are than six pictures showing how exciting and worldly you are but make you look silly, or fat or ugly.
You absolutely cannot skimp on this part of how to meet men online. What do your current batch of pictures say about you? Are they all webcam shots or cellphone shots of you sitting in your car? Sorry Hun, you just made yourself look like everyone else. If you’re going to use pictures that you shot of yourself, at least do it in front of something interesting. We’re looking for how to meet men online here, not parole officers!
Profile Picture Secret: Get on Craigslist. Find your state or city or country (on the right) Go to the Creative link in the Gigs section (near the bottom) and post up a free ad asking for a photographer to shoot some casual shots of you for online dating. Make sure you mention online dating. You don’t want a cheesy studio portrait of you with your hand on your chin. Just something well lit and flattering showing you in an OUTDOOR situation. Why outdoors? Because EVERYONE ELSE has shots of themselves somewhere inside.
Here is the part where it gets tricky. We firmly believe you have to pay for these photographs. Whether its fifty bucks, a case of beer or a happy meal, you better offer something in exchange for a photographers work. If you don’t, you’ll just get some dude showing up with a disposable camera who will try to have sex with you. That might sound kinda of interesting on paper, but the guy who shows up will not be someone you’d even want to touch your trash.
Dont be cheap here. A pro will cost around $200 to $300 but it will be well worth it.
What to say in your online profile
Thats right. The more you write… hold it… the more interesting things you write, the more interesting men show up.
A hot picture will get you tons of responses, but everything you say will filter out all the sleazebags. You will actually get less responses the more you write. Really? Yep. One of the best secrets on how to meet men online is to let guys know what you do and don’t want. Most women just put down a bunch do’s and don’ts that a guy has to fit into. The better way is to describe yourself so he will know what he has to show up with.
You can say, Have a job and ambition, etc. Or even better, you can say, I’ve worked hard for the place Im at in my life. Im looking for someone who can appreciate the benefits of hard work. Niiiice. See what you’re doing here is getting rid of the guy who just has a random, unfulfilling job and attracting the guy who’s passionate about what he does.
Always describe something about yourself first and apply that to the perfect man for you. This is definitely a show me yours if I show you mine first situation on how to meet a man online. If you want an independent man, tell him how independent you are. If you want a manly man, tell him how his confidence and ability to take care of business makes you swoon. If you want someone to be funny, then show a little humor yourself. EVERYBODY wants a funny guy, but why should he pick you over all the other babes online? Because you are funny enough yourself to make the whole interaction incredible!
This profile is about YOU! People who dont know how to talk about themselves are simply not interesting. NEVER put something down that basically states, Ill fill this out later or I dont know what to say. Losers and predators can smell fear or indecision. If thats the bulk of what you are trying to attract, then don’t say much in your profile. There’s the right way and the stupid way of how to meet men online.
Take the time and sit down with paper and pen and write out some cool things about you. What makes you unique? What makes you happy? What do you adore about intimacy? What is your favorite thing about men? What have you always wanted to do? Now put these into sentences that also encourage him to step up to the plate. Say one of the things that makes you unique is that you like to sew. This is not something that would attract a man (unless his clothes were old and threadbare). Don’t just say you like to sew. Boring, boring, boring! How about, Im pretty good with a needle and thread and appreciate a man who understands craftsmanship. You took something boring and turned it into something that just made him think.
Actually meet men online
Don’t just sit there! The most important part of how to meet a man online is to actually meet them! You can actually make moves too. If you see someone with an awesome profile or a great look, chances are tons of women are lurking and waiting for him to contact them. Better chances are that he won’t. You don’t have to be overt or up in his face, just a simple, Your profile is funny or even just a ”You’re pretty cute” will make him take a second look at you if not a first look.
What are the options here? The first one is that he’ll look at your profile and think, “hey this girl is cute… and funny! Im gonna flirt back!” The second is that he gracefully thanks you. The third option is that he doesn’t respond at all.
If he writes a bunch back to you or he’s all flirty, you’re in! Flirt back and see where it goes. If its a simple response thanking you for the compliment, you still have a great chance to meet this guy. For one, he’s at least nice and wasn’t scared off by your profile. So nows the time to ask him something interesting. If you can, ask him something about his profile and let him tell you about himself. If he doesn’t say much in the profile, it’s time to break out the big guns and ask him something really fun. Theres a great book called 1000 Questions for Couples that has tons of cute and interesting questions you can ask your love interest. This will work great for how to meet men online.
If he doesn’t answer, it’s not time to get upset. Before you get frustrated and think you suck, consider this: all paid websites leave their members up forever. Even way after that persons subscription expired, they will still offer him up as someone you can get in touch with. He could be married by now for all you know. So don’t get upset if you get no response. Other guys have a certain type they are looking for. If you don’t fit that type, then you don’t have a chance. No big deal for you. It just makes how to meet men online that much more easy; they filter themselves out.
The awesome thing about online dating is that it doesn’t drain you emotionally like in-person dating. If some guy is a jerk by email… delete… poof! No more jerk. You can screen tons of men without leaving your house or spending money on dinner. Don’t look at dating this way with a sense of dread. It’s comparatively cheap, it’s easy, plus you can hone your skills on how to meet men online with everyone you contact.
Get online and cater to your flavor
This might be the duh part in this whole how to meet men online situation, but which website do you join? Depending on who you are and what you’re looking for, theres like a zillion dating websites out there! Let’s start with what you’re looking for. We recommend joining at least two sites. Pick a general one and then one that specializes in your flavor.
What?!! Your flavor is something specific about you. Some of these things might be seen as a negative, but there’s millions of people out there just like you or that like your particular deal. For example if you are more experienced and just getting back into the dating scene, some might see their age as a point of dread. Seriously, there are tons of people your age looking to meet you!
If you’re over forty, there are many sites that cater to the crowd in the middle. There are even more for people getting into the older ranges.
You might think that having kids makes you less desirable in the dating world. Let’s not lie to ourselves, having children might scare away some guys not willing to take on responsibility, but there are tons of guys looking just for you.
What if your particular flavor is that you are dating and have a sexually transmitted disease? Some might feel a horrible shame and embarrassment over this and it might paralyze them into getting out and dating. Figuring out how to meet men online with an STD has never been easier. Once again, problem solved: STD Friends has tons of people in your same situation. Dating with STDs used to be treacherous. You find someone that you start to like, eventually you gotta have the talk. This is usually followed by him freaking out and making you feel even more like a leper. Now you dont even need to have that talk…
Another flavor is your size. If you are big or are attracted to big men, there are tons of guys looking just for you at BBPeople Meet. Never act self conscious about your weight in the dating world. Give a site like this a chance and see that there are people who are totally in to you exactly the way you are.
What if you are on the opposite side of the spectrum and you are slim and really take care of yourself? Finding a guy online who you can do outdoor activities and workout with is just what you need! Check out Slim.com to find a hunky guy who shares your passion for fitness!
Awesome general dating sites
Now that you’re on your way to how to meet men online that are already pre-selected, its time to pick a general dating site. Sure, you might have a particular flavor, but you should also look into the sites with tons of people on them. You’ll be pleasantly surprised the quality guys you can find on them. The best way in how to meet men online is to be all over online.
Picking a general site is a little bit trickier. There are loads of them out there and each attracts a different set of daters. What is your goal in all of this? Are you looking to meet a bunch of cool friends and see what develops or are you looking for the next great love of your life? Sure, wed all like that but are you looking for a traditional relationship or something more fun?
If you’re marriage minded or looking for a long term relationship, we recommend eHarmony. The guys on there have responded to the ads talking about soul-mates and finding the one and they joined. That shows they are at least a little more serious. Chemistry Chemistry is a hipper, newer version of eHarmony and features a younger crowd also looking for something a little more substantial.
If you’re just out looking for dates, OKCupid is packed with fun singles of all ages who are dying to meet you. You should also check out the largest site, Match. They win just in sheer numbers of singles on that site.
Go get em girl!
You’re up, you’re online, you’re armed with all the tips and tricks on how to meet men online, you have a profile that rocks. Sit back and let the men trickle (or pour) in. Unless they something completely stupid or have a profile that shows how pathetic they are, flirt with all of them. If they still seem cool, its time to meet up. For more information, check out our sections on online safety and online relationships.
If you’re really serious about how to meet men online, you must take charge of your own destiny and go for the ones you want and who will probably want you too!