He is Still a Virgin

by Laura
(Adelaide)

I have been friends with this guy for a while and he had declared his love for me a while ago and I shot him down. Recently, I have been talking to him a lot more and I know I hurt him a lot. I don’t want to do it again but I’m not sure whether I want more then just friends with him? He’s really intimidating and I get so uncomfortable around him so I usually end up acting like a jerk.

He is strangely still a virgin and that’s frightening as I don’t feel sexually comfortable with a guy that has no idea what to do! What should I do?

Our Advice to You

The Whole Thing Sounds Awkward
By: Samantha

First of all, I’m not sure how someone who’s a virgin can be intimidating? Your fear of being sexually comfortable with him is a little off too. How does someone with no prior experience on a topic manage to create so much tension in you? The fact that you know he’s a virgin puts a lot of power in your hands. Essentially, you are the teacher here. I don’t think there is any need for you to be afraid of someone like this. But I do understand where you are coming from. Many women don’t want a man who is a virgin because they want a man who can hop into the sack and know what he’s doing CONFIDENTLY. Even if he’s lousy at it, it’s the confidence that rocks the boat.

I think the bigger problem here is that he’s already declared his love for you even though you two were not in a relationship. It just makes everything awkward for you and it put a lot of pressure on you to date him. It really doesn’t matter that he is still a virgin as long as you don’t mind showing him the ropes, but don’t let him push you around by his unsolicited feeling that make you feel guilty because he comes off as such a nice guy.