Did you really pee on my bathroom floor?
I met this guy online, he had a fabulous profile: witty, different, direct, mysterious, cute, very good looking. We didn’t do much email chatting, he just asked me if I wanted to meet up for a drink and I agreed.
So we met at a train station one evening in his neighborhood. We walked a couple of blocks to a bar and had a couple of beers. This part of the date went awesome, great conversation, lots of laughs, no awkward silences..
I really thought I got lucky with this one.
We started talking about movies, he said his favorite was Clockwork Orange, I had never seen it (little did I know, this was a big red flag). He asked me if I wanted to watch it that evening, I figured it was only about 9pm at this time and well, why not? Great guy, beautiful evening.
So we started to walk back to his place, we were both buzzed from the beers. He says, “Actually, is it okay if we go to your place to watch the movie? My place is a huge mess and I don’t want you to see it right now.” Weird, but okay. Not a big fan of a guy knowing where I live on the first date, but he was pretty awesome.
So we go to his building, he takes me to the roof top deck and leaves me there (RED FLAG: wife? girlfriend?), he goes back into the building and gets the movie and a bottle of wine and comes back to retrieve me. We jump in his car and head for my place.
The guy that I met a couple of hours earlier completely vacated the situation at that point. Enter a man I want nothing to do with.
We get comfy on the couch and start watching the movie. Keep in mind, this is the first skin to skin interaction we have had to date. He puts his hand down my shirt within the first 5 mins of sitting there. He proceeds to drink almost the complete bottle of wine, besides the 2 glasses he spilt in my living room (plus a broken wine glass) of which he offered to clean nothing up.
Oh! I loved it when he said “go get me another glass of wine babe” when I was still merely 1/3 into my own, intact, glass. Or, my favorite “jump up and press rewind, babe”. Didn’t your mom teach you how to say please?? Damn, I felt like a deprived 50’s housewife.
We proceeded to make out some, and he got more and more aggressive, to the point of hurting my and my poor nipples. He tried to take off my clothes probably a dozen times. After I said no, each time, he would give a big SIGH and pout. After explaining that I have roommates and that there will be no nakedness in my living room, he suggested that we move to the bedroom. After another NO, I got another sigh and pout. He asked me on 3 occasions if I had any more beer or wine (because he drank/spilt all that he brought), after I said no, he gave another sigh and pout.
So, the topper of this whole night. He used my restroom, which was a couple of doors down the hallway. Sitting in the living room with the TV on, could hear him peeing, to my realization he didn’t shut the door (WEIRD?!), this was after I told him I had roommates at home at least 3 times. I used the bathroom a bit later, to my astonishment he had peed on my bathroom floor. Not just splatter here and there, there was a wet splatter circle 2 feet around my toilet, disgusting! There was pee on my bathroom floor!!!
Midnight came around, and I gave my best efforts to kick him out politely by mentioning on multiple occasions how early I have to get up, etc etc etc. He kept putting it up saying ‘Just a few minutes longer.’ I finally got fed up, gave him his movie, coat and shoes and said “Okay, now I am am asking you to leave. good bye.” I walked over to the door and stood there until he gathered himself and left. I had bad dreams all night that he was showing back up, Egh!!
Online Dating Lessons learned:
- Never drink too much to impair judgement on the first date, the point of a first date is to be conscious in the moment. It is hard to do that with too many beers going on.
- Never, NEVER! Let a guy know where I live on the first date, no matter how innocent the situation or how great the guy.
- There is a certain point in which his feelings just don’t matter and I should have cut my losses and kicked his ass out the minute he put his hand down my shirt the first time.
He texted me the next day and apologized, saying that he was not himself and hoped that we could talk. I responded by telling him that I preferred that we did not talk and wished him luck in his search.